Happy "Bumps" Day

Feb 11, 2007


The day started out pretty well. I got up at 10 in the morning with a slight head ace and a sore throat, I had been suffering from fever for the past few days. It was a Sunday and went on like any other Sunday , sleep in the afternoon and the game time in the evening was allocated for mugging and assignment completion (quizzes started the day after tomorrow).

Fast Forward, Time 11 pm .

My friend Tanker comes to my room when I just sat down to read for the Networks quiz on Tuesday. "Kamus birthday tomorrow" he says , " Bring him to Ganga at 11:50 . Tell him there is a cake waiting for him ." Realizing there will be a bumps fest awaiting Kamu and free cake , I was rearing to go. I took great pride in being given the responsibility of making sure he didn't know about it and that he didn't try to escape his impending doom. Little did I know that reality would be a whole lot different that what I pictured it to be.

11:55pm Feb 11

I took Kamu to the 6Th wing of Ganga Hostel where most of the "gult" Junta lived. Chanti comes out of his room welcoming "us" and calls all his wing mates. Apparently its Manjus birthday the same day too. About fifteen guys come out and Chanti says " Julie , You and Kamu READY". Ready ?? Why me? Its Kamus birthday right? Then everything became all too clear. I had gotten Internship in two companies and didn't tell the "Ganga guys" for the fear of getting bumps. Somehow the word got out and the "Ganga guys" who came to know about it were furious that I didn't tell them personally and for that they were going to give me bumps . The irony was, even if I had told them about it, I would have gotten bumps .

12:00 Feb 12

The bump fest started with Manju being lifted by Mechanic and Testis and ten of the other "Ganga guys" which didn't include Chanti "the Camera Guy" , Mechanic and Testis "The Lifters" , Kamu "I am Next" and Me "I wish I was dead" pounding away at "You Know What". The entire wing was filled with Manjus cries of agony and weird thoughts were running through my mind.
Should I run for my life now and risk being caught at a later point of time?? or Endure the pain for a few minutes and get it over with?? or Make a pact with them?.

Then comes Kamu's turn. This time the pounding seemed a little listless, and the cries a little shallow, may be they were tired. Option two it is , get it over with now when they are tired. But as I was later told they were actually saving there energy for me and weren't tired at all ( Bad choice).

12:10 Time Stops, My Turn.

My mind went blank, all thoughts were erased , I began pleading with them , tried to make truce but I was violating the number one rule of getting bumps . For those who are not aware of the rules here are the two and only rules of getting bumps.

First rule of getting bumps is You DO NOT make negotiations.
Second rule of getting bumps is You DO NOT make negotiations.

As expected they didn't heed to my pleas and before I knew it, my feet were off the ground. At 5'10'' , weighing 84 Kgs and possessing an behind that rivals Janet Jackson's, you think you a have pretty good chance of fighting off these guys or at least a good "cushion" for sustaining the pain. But let me tell you this the only advantage I got was there were less number of "active" participants as four people had to lift me. The pounding began , one after the other "the participants" took turns in positioning themselves , sometimes taking a run-up and began kicking away. It was like one of those informal competitions you had with your friends in school, Who can throw this ball the farthest? or something like that , but then it was, Who can kick the hardest ? or Who can inflict the maximum amount of pain? or Lets see who can make him cry?
When the first kick was placed , there was a searing pain through my bottom and I shouted at the top of my lungs. The kicks became harder and shouts louder. The thing that pissed me off was there were some innovative kicks. Kicking with both the legs simultaneously and jumping in the air and kicking were some of the things I could remember during those 5 min apart from the pain. Some of the kicks go off target and hit you in the back or in the thigh region further adding to your agony. To top it all, during birthdays they actually wish you "Happy Birthday" after giving bumps. Once it's over, the pain doesn't end there , your bottom becomes numb initially and then the blood rushes in , that's when the pain really kicks in. You cant walk for a few days and you cant sleep looking at the ceiling.
All in all, it was a good learning experience, lesson learnt -
"Never go to Ganga on your Birthday"